It happens to all of us – that time when we’ve finally had “enough”. The pandemic has fast-forwarded an awakening for many women, and made it even more apparent the burden of always giving at the expense of our own needs.
At Kind Lab, we talk a lot about keeping your cup full, a synonym for self care. Women are often caregivers, whether that’s explicitly stated or not, and the tendency is to always give while prioritizing everyone else’s needs over our own. But you can’t fill from an empty cup.
If you’ve found yourself with nothing left and made the selfless decision to start taking care of yourself – whether that’s establishing boundaries or taking a little more time for yourself – and have been met with resistance from those you care for, we see you.
Have you lost your mind, or found your voice?
Hysterical. It’s when you’ve finally had enough and you just snap. It’s happened to all of us, but for women, it’s less socially acceptable. It seems that men can be angry, but women can’t be. So much so that it was named after us.
It’s a matter of perspective. Or prejudice.
It was pseudo-scientific prejudice that birthed hysteria, a condition specific to women that was attributed to physical and moral degeneration, and heavily burdened with guilt and shame on the part of women who “contracted” it.
If you think that’s old news, it wasn’t that long ago that men in the US could commit their wives & daughters to an insane asylum without providing a reason or medical diagnosis.
The idea that women who can’t be silenced are “hysterical” or “insane” is not new. Today, we know it as women being “emotional”.
Emotion and women.
Society puts a heavy burden on women to be caretakers, and to prioritize the happiness of others over themselves. Think of all those times you were polite when someone made you uncomfortable, or when you used your physical/emotional energy for someone else’s benefit when you were running dangerously low yourself.
We are the superheroes who can do it all, right?
Now, with the years of putting ourselves last plus a pandemic plus menopause knocking, we need support. We’re not used to asking for it, and they’re not used to us needing it (or giving it). And many times, that results in us not getting it.
Which is frustrating.
It’s frustrating that those that we sacrificed our own health and happiness for aren’t willing or able to do the same for us. That we’ve played by society’s rules for so long, and now we’re wondering when they got so unfair. That our bodies seem to have their own mind, and are nowhere near where we want or need them to be.
The realization that we don’t want to be superheroes. We want others to step up and help us.
And now we’re speaking up.
And pushing back. We’re done with living our lives on their terms, and are starting to create boundaries for ourselves to protect us from the unacceptable.
After so many years of service, smiles, and silence, it seems to them that we’re going crazy.
Finding Our Voice
There’s a saying that if you want to know who rules over you, think about who you can’t criticize. Now think of the people who are angry/irritated/shocked when you speak your truth or set boundaries. Do those circles overlap?
The difference between sucking up your feelings and speaking your truth is self-love.
Women are waking up to living lives for themselves. It’s not something that we want, but rather that we need.
We’re changing the rules. While that can be confusing for people around us, it doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
Find your voice, and speak your truth. It’s time to learn that prioritizing your own health and happiness isn’t selfish – it’s anything but. Go forward in truth, and embrace this new chapter in life.
This is only the beginning.
“Stand before the people you fear and speak your mind, even if your voice shakes… When you least expect it, someone may actually listen to what you have to say.”
Maggie Kuhn
Women, we hear you. We’ve created plant-based solutions that help you embrace your body, evolve with nature, and excel at life.
We can help with our Lift Capsules that boost your mood, energy and focus during the day, Rest Chews give you the sleep to be resilient, and Rest Balm to relieve body aches and discomfort so you can move with ease and keep doing the things you love.
Please don’t settle and don’t give up. There is so much left in life for you, and you deserve to be happy.
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